schizo

This last week, I've felt schizophrenic.  

I'm literally ALL over the place (physically & otherwise).  I really don't enjoy the "hair on fire" days anymore.  I used to be an expert at shoe-horning activities together like a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle.  I could squeeze activities & tasks together with amazing efficiency.  However, cramming more in has become something I loathe.  There's been so much on my mind & plate that I actually fell asleep at 8:30 last night, on the verge of a migraine (thankfully avoided).

Here are just a few things that I've done within the last week, just to offer a taste of the extremes . .  .

• met a friend at the Emergency Room to care for her son while daughter waited to be seen
• completed online testing & went to a job interview in Glendale
• helped recruit friends for a fundraiser for a friend's film
• took treats to Mahalia's class
• met with a lawyer
• applied for & followed up on multiple jobs around town
• completed info for our website's upcoming face lift
• did laundry & dishes
• choreographed & ran through the 3.5 minute salsa routine with students for the upcoming benefit
• had a play date at the park with Mahalia's class mates in Sierra Madre
• saw my friend's new apartment in Old Town
• completed training in downtown to be a part of the prayer team at church
• hosted multiple friends for home cooked meals at our house
• booked Dan's travel to Festival of Faith & Music in Grand Rapids
• booked a salsa teaching gig at a new club here in Pasadena
• finished the paperwork for our merchant account
• managed to squeeze in a date with Dan :-)

I feel like I'm wearing so many hats every day, that sometimes I forget what the heck I'm doing.  One minute I'm doing dishes & literally the next minute, I'm on the phone with a potential employer & racing to finish their application process.

I'm also in the process of grieving the loss of being at home with my kiddo full time.  It's been a glorious (albeit not glamorous) 2 years.  What a gift . . . one that I never imagined would have come my way.  So being caught in the purgatory between motherhood, being a co-worker with Dan, applying for new jobs, and teaching gigs as they come up - all while trying to maintain friendships with those who have become so dear, has been like a circus act.  I remind myself of a comedic juggler - the kind where they drop more things than they juggle.

So my prayer has been for grace and peace.  Grace for each day, and peace in my heart.