revived

Since June . . . this is how I've felt:

Need I say more?

However, after five months in our current housing situation, 5 months with steady income, 2 months on meds, and 4 days in Los Angeles . . . I feel REVIVED!!!

About six months ago, I thought I'd never feel like me again.  It was horrible - dreadful really.  But over time, God has steadily revived my soul.  And this last week in LA was just what I needed to put the final nail in my coffin of sorrow.

I got to spend time with people who dearly love me & know how to have fun.   I ate food with incredible flavor.  I danced myself silly.  And I had a beautiful prayer session where God confirmed all of the beautiful things he's been telling me for years.  Even though my life might look like a hot mess from the outside, I feel good.

I'm anxious to bring my joy into the little things.  And today it trickled over into my eating habits.  Since being here, I've gained 15 pounds people!  And what have I been doing about that?  Nothing.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Yep - I've been giving myself a pass, along with a huge dose of grace & "you'll get to it when you get to it."  

But today I went to the grocery store & hooked these beautiful lunches up:



Seems that I might just have a bit of my mojo back!

honored

The last 48 hours I have been deeply honored to spend it with folks who've been through hell.

A young friend of the family spent some time at our house.  He's so sweet.  You'd never know that he lost his father this week from a brutal murder, while his mother lays in the hospital suffering from a gunshot wound to the head.  His eyes remain bright & his heart soft.  When we stopped by the store, he picked out a card to give his Mom (that he hasn't been able to see).  Said he's been praying for her every day.  He's a total sweetheart.  Someone mentioned that it was good for him to be at our house on Thanksgiving.  Actually, it was good for me.

Then we spent the day out in rural MN with friends.  A friend of theirs showed up at the house.  I translated as he shared his story.  His three kids had been taken away by the county the night before, based on accusations.  He was devastated.  He was also full of faith - that God sees all & is just.  He shared how he made the grueling trip from Honduras 10 years before (you can't imagine what he went through) to give his children a better chance at life & that he was hopeful that no matter what happened to him, his life wasn't about himself, but his children.  I was moved to tears multiple times by his incredible sacrifice, his love & his faith.

Thanksgiving this year was an honor - an honor to be in the presence of truly great people.

indigo

After Dan's commitment the last couple of days, we decided to move downtown to be closer to the action.  So we found a little gem in the heart of The Windy City - Hotel Indigo.  It's so fun & decorated REALLY uniquely.  Love it.  Here's a shot of the lobby.

So one of my favorite things to do is sit by myself in the early hours of the morning & reflect . . . read a good book . . . and journal.  This hotel has the perfect place for it.  Here's "my" chair from this morning.  It's so comfy!!!

It's really good to sit by myself in a new place - with a sense of adventure - and possibility of what could be.  I'm so thankful that I've had this time to be still in such a beautiful space!  Feeling really hopeful this morning.

Looking forward to the rest of the day of adventure with Dan!

what a beauty

you can call me champ

We got a ping-pong table at work.  Been quietly working my way into the circuit.  Played a bunch of guys along the way.  Heard about our in-house champ.  Just beat him!  Feelin' good . . . feelin' good.

proud & cute

When it comes to work, I find a lot of inner motivation, and don't feel the need for much (or any) external validation at work.  Must be my German-ness :-)  I'm happy to simply do my work & I find great inner satisfaction in doing it with excellence.

However, I got a really great compliment.  In fact, three different people came up to me today (after our company's tailgate party) and told me that since I arrived - 3 months ago - that things have gotten significantly better . . . I felt great knowing that my presence & dedication has helped others feel like their work environment has improved since my arrival.

On a completely different note . . . aren't we adorable?! 

gained

Been feeling really grateful lately.  I feel like I've gained a lot over the last few months.  Here are a few of the highlights . . .

• a renewed relationship with my parents (it's been so great to get to re-know them during retirement)
• a job that I'm good at
• more patience
• a deep appreciation for people who've gone through extreme loss
• reconnection with old friends
• time with my extended family (due to living with my folks)
• a set of Grandparents who invest in my kiddo daily
• about 8 pounds (though this might be the low-light!)
• medicine to help me feel WAY better
• a clear knowledge that I don't know as much as I thought
• an openness to the unexpected & being more flexible
• a deeper sense of God's love & faithfulness